To satisfy Option B, you must watch the recording of the synchronous webinar and complete all of the following: Create and submit a genogram representing

WEBVTT 1 00:00:02.680 –> 00:00:03.550 Dr. Oliver Davis: Alrighty 2 00:00:04.910 –> 00:00:07.429 Dr. Oliver Davis: before we begin our presentation. 3 00:00:09.170 –> 00:00:13.239 Dr. Oliver Davis: there have been several situations going on with groups. 4 00:00:14.550 –> 00:00:18.256 Dr. Oliver Davis: and I've gotten a lot of groups. If 5 00:00:19.840 –> 00:00:22.589 Dr. Oliver Davis: you're having some issues with groups. 6 00:00:23.854 –> 00:00:31.089 Dr. Oliver Davis: people not responding back to your groups, calling you back or setting up times on time. Can you please stay afterwards 7 00:00:32.110 –> 00:00:35.200 Dr. Oliver Davis: because we can have that discussion afterwards. 8 00:00:36.040 –> 00:00:36.665 Dr. Oliver Davis: because 9 00:00:37.450 –> 00:00:41.400 Dr. Oliver Davis: it's causing some problems for a variety of people. We all have. 10 00:00:42.190 –> 00:00:46.889 Dr. Oliver Davis: a different time zone. We have to do groups, we have to do role plays. 11 00:00:47.200 –> 00:01:01.779 Dr. Oliver Davis: And I've got numerous emails requesting to switch to groups which others to groups. But some groups are working. Some groups are not working. And then just because I switch it to group doesn't mean that's gonna work them. And and that's becoming a problem. 12 00:01:02.600 –> 00:01:06.690 Dr. Oliver Davis: And if you are having in that problem. 13 00:01:07.588 –> 00:01:16.189 Dr. Oliver Davis: Maybe you I don't know. Meet, stay afterwards, or like to talk to some of you. We will not record that part of it. 14 00:01:16.230 –> 00:01:18.510 Dr. Oliver Davis: but it's more than normal 15 00:01:18.590 –> 00:01:21.410 Dr. Oliver Davis: than what I've experienced in other classes 16 00:01:21.420 –> 00:01:32.530 Dr. Oliver Davis: which has delayed several people in order to be able to turn in their assignment. That's coming up, that that was last week's different assignments that is, throwing people behind. 17 00:01:32.820 –> 00:01:39.468 Dr. Oliver Davis: So if that has affected you, which I know some of us has been affected by it. 18 00:01:40.180 –> 00:01:51.660 Dr. Oliver Davis: Continue to keep me posted. I will not harm your grade, or allow that to harm your grade, because I have been in group projects before where did not respond, and it was very frustrating. 19 00:01:52.200 –> 00:01:54.479 Dr. Oliver Davis: But the nature of this course 20 00:01:55.058 –> 00:01:59.100 Dr. Oliver Davis: with the assignments. We really need to have people to help each other out. 21 00:01:59.740 –> 00:02:02.219 Dr. Oliver Davis: And in order to do that 22 00:02:02.782 –> 00:02:05.840 Dr. Oliver Davis: so we can have some consistency each week. 23 00:02:05.860 –> 00:02:12.069 Dr. Oliver Davis: As you've had. Cbt, or whatever the theory is, you practice within your group 24 00:02:12.100 –> 00:02:23.800 Dr. Oliver Davis: and you do that. I just really want to be able to see some of you in action from that standpoint. Years ago we had to do it all in class, and then now they break it up where you do it individually. 25 00:02:24.080 –> 00:02:30.850 Dr. Oliver Davis: and my Thursday night classes. Some of you may have been in my 5 or 0 0 4. We used to go for a while. 26 00:02:31.060 –> 00:02:34.129 Dr. Oliver Davis: and that has different, says this. Change the system. 27 00:02:34.530 –> 00:02:38.920 Dr. Oliver Davis: So any questions on that before we start 28 00:02:40.450 –> 00:02:41.709 Dr. Oliver Davis: any comments? 29 00:02:46.450 –> 00:02:49.940 Dr. Oliver Davis: Alright. Well, then, stay afterwards. 30 00:02:50.180 –> 00:02:53.639 Dr. Oliver Davis: so we can make sure that we are on the same page. 31 00:02:54.228 –> 00:03:08.880 Dr. Oliver Davis: This helps your learners people yourself. It helps you because people just don't want to be late. I know. I know different situations have come up, and a lot of people have sent me their individual issues. But come on, let's work with each other, please. 32 00:03:09.010 –> 00:03:10.840 Dr. Oliver Davis: I would appreciate that. 33 00:03:11.220 –> 00:03:16.069 Dr. Oliver Davis: Because just like tonight, we're gonna be talking about trauma. And we all have enough trauma 34 00:03:16.680 –> 00:03:19.540 Dr. Oliver Davis: in our lives and being adults. And 35 00:03:19.600 –> 00:03:24.510 Dr. Oliver Davis: what's happening with this country over the next week and all these other things, there's a lot of stress going on. 36 00:03:24.990 –> 00:03:30.850 Dr. Oliver Davis: And so people have a lot of trauma in our lives, and it's not the easiest topic. 37 00:03:31.160 –> 00:03:32.050 Terri Washington: So it. 38 00:03:32.050 –> 00:03:33.180 Dr. Oliver Davis: You're gonna get through 39 00:03:34.410 –> 00:03:38.410 Dr. Oliver Davis: tonight, we're going to start off with a song. 40 00:03:38.500 –> 00:03:40.979 Dr. Oliver Davis: And as we talk about trauma 41 00:03:41.110 –> 00:03:44.829 Dr. Oliver Davis: and childhood trauma and other issues from that standpoint 42 00:03:45.210 –> 00:03:48.580 Dr. Oliver Davis: right? But like I told you before, I like to share a song. 43 00:03:48.950 –> 00:03:50.919 Dr. Oliver Davis: Not that I'm gonna sing, but 44 00:03:52.083 –> 00:03:53.830 Dr. Oliver Davis: one night. 45 00:03:54.050 –> 00:03:54.335 Kimberley Mattioli: Yeah. 46 00:03:54.910 –> 00:03:56.170 Dr. Oliver Davis: I have done that before. 47 00:03:56.710 –> 00:03:57.769 Dr. Oliver Davis: but not tonight. 48 00:04:15.920 –> 00:04:16.660 Dr. Oliver Davis: There we go. 49 00:04:22.079 –> 00:04:23.638 Dr. Oliver Davis: Hey, everyone! Put on 50 00:04:24.009 –> 00:04:24.604 Dr. Oliver Davis: there! 51 00:04:26.009 –> 00:04:28.819 Dr. Oliver Davis: mute, please. Thank you. I appreciate it. 52 00:04:31.729 –> 00:04:32.639 Dr. Oliver Davis: Thanks. 53 00:04:34.189 –> 00:04:36.659 Dr. Oliver Davis: Have you seen my childhood. 54 00:04:37.970 –> 00:04:55.690 Trinidad: I'm searching for the world that I've been looking around in the lost and found my heart. 55 00:04:56.710 –> 00:04:57.650 Trinidad: No. 56 00:04:58.490 –> 00:04:59.380 Trinidad: understand. 57 00:05:04.440 –> 00:05:08.239 Trinidad: It's a strange eccentricity 58 00:05:08.280 –> 00:05:09.470 Trinidad: he is 59 00:05:09.690 –> 00:05:12.029 Trinidad: because I keep kidding 60 00:05:14.130 –> 00:05:15.109 Trinidad: like a child 61 00:05:16.250 –> 00:05:17.360 Trinidad: and be 62 00:05:17.530 –> 00:05:20.120 Trinidad: a 63 00:05:20.690 –> 00:05:21.360 Trinidad: but 64 00:05:23.460 –> 00:05:24.390 Trinidad: was there 65 00:05:24.860 –> 00:05:25.530 Trinidad: no 66 00:05:27.930 –> 00:05:29.350 Trinidad: cause? I love 67 00:05:30.120 –> 00:05:34.930 Trinidad: such elementary thing 68 00:05:36.210 –> 00:05:38.050 Trinidad: to compensate 69 00:05:38.920 –> 00:05:39.760 Trinidad: it 70 00:05:40.000 –> 00:05:41.729 Trinidad: for the child? 71 00:05:46.740 –> 00:05:47.550 Trinidad: I've 72 00:05:47.720 –> 00:05:48.570 Trinidad: know 73 00:05:54.180 –> 00:05:56.360 Trinidad: you've seen my child. 74 00:05:58.920 –> 00:06:03.040 Trinidad: I'm searching for that wonder, and 75 00:06:03.110 –> 00:06:04.689 Trinidad: my youth 76 00:06:04.910 –> 00:06:09.810 Trinidad: like pirates in adventurous dreams. 77 00:06:10.430 –> 00:06:11.270 Trinidad: Quest 78 00:06:12.450 –> 00:06:15.360 Trinidad: the throne. 79 00:06:20.350 –> 00:06:22.530 Trinidad: Catch me! 80 00:06:23.150 –> 00:06:24.150 Trinidad: Try hard 81 00:06:24.670 –> 00:06:26.500 Trinidad: to love me 82 00:06:28.150 –> 00:06:30.190 Trinidad: in your heart. 83 00:06:41.380 –> 00:06:43.809 Trinidad: Have you seen my child? 84 00:06:46.640 –> 00:06:48.660 Trinidad: A 85 00:07:00.730 –> 00:07:01.480 Trinidad: oh. 86 00:07:13.330 –> 00:07:20.429 Trinidad: strange things that way, cause I love such. 87 00:07:22.450 –> 00:07:25.750 Trinidad: It's been my 88 00:07:29.960 –> 00:07:32.000 Trinidad: for the child 89 00:07:32.630 –> 00:07:33.560 Trinidad: shine! 90 00:07:38.930 –> 00:07:40.020 Trinidad: I've never known. 91 00:07:47.110 –> 00:07:49.289 Trinidad: Have you seen my child. 92 00:07:49.610 –> 00:07:50.310 Trinidad: but who 93 00:07:52.600 –> 00:07:55.899 Trinidad: I'm searching for that wandering? 94 00:07:56.260 –> 00:07:59.559 Trinidad: My youth, like fantastic. 95 00:08:00.850 –> 00:08:02.300 Trinidad: is to share 96 00:08:03.310 –> 00:08:04.550 Trinidad: dreams. I would dare. 97 00:08:13.130 –> 00:08:16.490 Trinidad: And your dream 98 00:08:16.850 –> 00:08:17.830 Trinidad: try hard. 99 00:08:18.690 –> 00:08:23.399 Trinidad: Want to love me, the pain 100 00:08:23.900 –> 00:08:25.330 Trinidad: aim for you 101 00:08:27.710 –> 00:08:28.390 Trinidad: I've had. 102 00:08:39.350 –> 00:08:40.770 Trinidad: Have you seen 103 00:08:42.169 –> 00:08:43.500 Trinidad: my 104 00:08:44.110 –> 00:08:45.230 Trinidad: my child? 105 00:09:00.910 –> 00:09:01.480 Dr. Oliver Davis: Hmm! 106 00:09:06.680 –> 00:09:07.580 Dr. Oliver Davis: Climate. 107 00:09:08.500 –> 00:09:09.849 Dr. Oliver Davis: childhood, trauma. 108 00:09:10.760 –> 00:09:13.450 Dr. Oliver Davis: what stood out for you as you listened to those words. 109 00:09:16.320 –> 00:09:17.400 Dr. Oliver Davis: childhood. 110 00:09:21.810 –> 00:09:23.380 Katie Moncelsi: It reminded me of 111 00:09:23.440 –> 00:09:30.399 Katie Moncelsi: how sometimes you talk about the parentification of children who've been in abusive homes, who end up having to be the parent. 112 00:09:30.640 –> 00:09:33.549 Katie Moncelsi: And it just it made me think about that when he's like. 113 00:09:33.710 –> 00:09:41.449 Katie Moncelsi: because obviously, you're seeing kids and all in it. And he was a child. But he never really had what we would consider a normal childhood. 114 00:09:41.950 –> 00:09:42.510 Dr. Oliver Davis: Hmm! 115 00:09:43.020 –> 00:09:44.999 Dr. Oliver Davis: A normal childhood. 116 00:09:45.380 –> 00:09:47.260 Dr. Oliver Davis: What's a normal childhood. 117 00:09:47.650 –> 00:09:50.590 Katie Moncelsi: I guess an unabusive one is what I mean. 118 00:09:51.600 –> 00:09:52.700 Dr. Oliver Davis: I hear you. 119 00:09:53.390 –> 00:09:56.209 Dr. Oliver Davis: I ask myself that question all the time. 120 00:09:56.820 –> 00:09:57.980 Dr. Oliver Davis: What's normal. 121 00:09:59.640 –> 00:10:03.679 Dr. Oliver Davis: Daddy? Mommy? 2 kids car, 2 garage, my house. 122 00:10:03.900 –> 00:10:04.820 Dr. Oliver Davis: corn. 123 00:10:05.060 –> 00:10:07.409 Dr. Oliver Davis: a cat, the dog a parakeet! 124 00:10:09.450 –> 00:10:10.719 Dr. Oliver Davis: Is that normal? 125 00:10:12.265 –> 00:10:12.700 Dr. Oliver Davis: Hmm! 126 00:10:13.300 –> 00:10:15.190 Dr. Oliver Davis: Have you seen my childhood 127 00:10:16.060 –> 00:10:23.090 Dr. Oliver Davis: in order to understand me? Oliver James Davis? Have you really taken the time to see my childhood. 128 00:10:24.390 –> 00:10:25.710 Dr. Oliver Davis: What else stood out for you? 129 00:10:26.290 –> 00:10:28.059 Dr. Oliver Davis: We're gonna talk about this tonight. 130 00:10:28.410 –> 00:10:29.280 Dr. Oliver Davis: Bye, bye. 131 00:10:29.280 –> 00:10:33.380 Trinidad: I saw the way he was sitting almost in a vulnerable state. 132 00:10:34.020 –> 00:10:36.009 Trinidad: It's very closed. Office. 133 00:10:36.560 –> 00:10:37.200 Dr. Oliver Davis: Hmm. 134 00:10:37.360 –> 00:10:39.450 Trinidad: Very shy. Didn't wanna 135 00:10:40.750 –> 00:10:43.010 Trinidad: kind of very closed off. 136 00:10:44.330 –> 00:10:45.510 Dr. Oliver Davis: What does that mean to you. 137 00:10:46.680 –> 00:10:46.970 Trinidad: Okay. 138 00:10:47.330 –> 00:10:54.739 Trinidad: almost trying to protect his inner self, you know. Didn't want to put himself out there. 139 00:10:56.310 –> 00:10:58.160 Dr. Oliver Davis: If you sat in front of my grandmother 140 00:10:58.210 –> 00:11:03.880 Dr. Oliver Davis: and I have my arms, I can still see it. She's been gone now for 23 years. 141 00:11:04.408 –> 00:11:11.939 Dr. Oliver Davis: But I could still see it. I'm sitting on her couch, and I'll plop down, and I have my arms like this, and she'll look over at me. 142 00:11:11.950 –> 00:11:14.000 Dr. Oliver Davis: she said, boy, what you holding on to? 143 00:11:15.400 –> 00:11:18.189 Dr. Oliver Davis: I said. Huh! She said. What you holding on to? 144 00:11:19.630 –> 00:11:23.109 Dr. Oliver Davis: She said. What's what you holding on to which means, What's what's what's bothering you? 145 00:11:25.050 –> 00:11:26.679 Dr. Oliver Davis: What am I holding on to 146 00:11:27.890 –> 00:11:31.939 Dr. Oliver Davis: within the last 24 h? I've had 4 people to die that I know. 147 00:11:33.670 –> 00:11:36.020 Dr. Oliver Davis: and so on. Facebook. It's been crazier. 148 00:11:36.530 –> 00:11:38.600 Dr. Oliver Davis: What am I holding on today's pain? 149 00:11:40.750 –> 00:11:46.810 Dr. Oliver Davis: You couldn't see that in my my bow tie you can see that I'm dressed up in Halloween colors. 150 00:11:47.720 –> 00:11:52.610 Dr. Oliver Davis: What are what are our kids holding on to when they come to our schools when they come to our therapy sessions? 151 00:11:54.050 –> 00:11:56.690 Dr. Oliver Davis: And grandma, she saw you holding like that 152 00:11:57.450 –> 00:12:00.949 Dr. Oliver Davis: because this is a vulnerable state. Anybody scared of turbulence on the plane? 153 00:12:01.480 –> 00:12:02.690 Dr. Oliver Davis: Besides me. 154 00:12:03.540 –> 00:12:10.292 Dr. Oliver Davis: Okay, yeah, I know. Okay. I know some of y'all don't want to admit it, but I am. I will admit that I have anxiety, and I'm sitting up there like. 155 00:12:10.560 –> 00:12:19.140 Dr. Oliver Davis: In fact, I had a blow in the plane. The flight attendant said, you need a therapist one time, I said. I am a therapist. Just pass me the bag, please just pass me the bag. 156 00:12:22.595 –> 00:12:23.640 Dr. Oliver Davis: Goodness! 157 00:12:24.050 –> 00:12:30.870 Dr. Oliver Davis: And I held on and held on the best time I had. I had a nun sitting next to me. She had a little, Rosie, I said, pray for me, please. 158 00:12:30.920 –> 00:12:41.609 Dr. Oliver Davis: We're going down. At least we'll go down with a prayer. So you know it's amazing what we hold on to the trauma. The fear that we hold on to. 159 00:12:43.720 –> 00:12:48.299 Katie Moncelsi: I think today a lot of the kids fear their safety going to school. 160 00:12:48.420 –> 00:12:51.399 Katie Moncelsi: and I remember going to school. I didn't have to have those fears. 161 00:12:52.090 –> 00:12:52.760 Dr. Oliver Davis: Hmm! 162 00:12:54.120 –> 00:12:55.519 Dr. Oliver Davis: When they get to school 163 00:12:55.920 –> 00:12:59.440 Dr. Oliver Davis: they fear walking. Going to the bus. Stop! We have fights at the bus. Stop. 164 00:13:00.530 –> 00:13:02.539 Dr. Oliver Davis: little girl. Came to me this morning. 165 00:13:02.930 –> 00:13:05.989 Dr. Oliver Davis: and this girl had threatened her. I said, are you on the bus with her? No. 166 00:13:06.610 –> 00:13:10.309 Dr. Oliver Davis: that's where they have to start off with. Are they on the bus? Because they on the bus? 167 00:13:10.330 –> 00:13:14.559 Dr. Oliver Davis: I have to go talk to the bus driver. I have to have another setup up there at your bus. Stop! 168 00:13:15.870 –> 00:13:18.739 Dr. Oliver Davis: Where's the fear coming from what's holding them in? 169 00:13:19.530 –> 00:13:22.369 Dr. Oliver Davis: Whereas making them viable, you noticed where he was sitting. 170 00:13:22.370 –> 00:13:26.040 Kimberley Mattioli: I think sometimes because I also work in a middle school. 171 00:13:26.070 –> 00:13:27.160 Kimberley Mattioli: and 172 00:13:27.680 –> 00:13:31.339 Kimberley Mattioli: what they fear, because when they get to school. 173 00:13:31.770 –> 00:13:36.330 Kimberley Mattioli: you know, they've left home. They've left the responsibilities they've left that there 174 00:13:36.350 –> 00:13:53.829 Kimberley Mattioli: they have a whole different set of anxieties. How do I look? How am I dressed? Are people talking about me is the gossip train circling to the point that it's created so much anxiety. We've had 3 fights this week that they happen like just at the edge of school and the library. 175 00:13:53.930 –> 00:13:57.039 Kimberley Mattioli: so they don't think that there's any ramifications. 176 00:13:57.970 –> 00:14:06.099 Kimberley Mattioli: And now it's created the fear of that safety of I leave home and I come to school, and then I leave again is something gonna happen to me. 177 00:14:06.850 –> 00:14:07.470 Dr. Oliver Davis: Yeah. 178 00:14:08.800 –> 00:14:10.560 Dr. Oliver Davis: Safety scary. 179 00:14:10.800 –> 00:14:12.940 Dr. Oliver Davis: I can't focus if I'm going to get beat up. 180 00:14:15.060 –> 00:14:15.780 Dr. Oliver Davis: Hmm. 181 00:14:17.340 –> 00:14:20.559 Dr. Oliver Davis: oh, there's a Russian up there today. I saw some kids rushing 182 00:14:21.110 –> 00:14:23.290 Dr. Oliver Davis: because they want to make sure they get breakfast. 183 00:14:25.500 –> 00:14:27.540 Dr. Oliver Davis: They don't get breakfast and our lunch. 184 00:14:28.180 –> 00:14:29.449 Dr. Oliver Davis: They don't get fed. 185 00:14:31.680 –> 00:14:33.989 Dr. Oliver Davis: Breakfast and lunch is the only meals they get. 186 00:14:34.940 –> 00:14:37.490 Dr. Oliver Davis: I used to. I live here in South Bend, Indiana. 187 00:14:38.080 –> 00:14:40.679 Dr. Oliver Davis: and it snows here a lot. 188 00:14:41.070 –> 00:14:43.330 Dr. Oliver Davis: sometimes 1520 plus inches. 189 00:14:43.920 –> 00:14:48.530 Dr. Oliver Davis: And when they just say South Bend schools closed. I say. Yay 190 00:14:48.620 –> 00:14:52.090 Dr. Oliver Davis: jumped back in my bed and I slept like a little kid. 191 00:14:53.390 –> 00:14:55.580 Dr. Oliver Davis: and then I thought about it. 192 00:14:55.680 –> 00:15:03.050 Dr. Oliver Davis: When we know a storm is coming. We can do a little bit better. We have, but sometimes this shows up on us because we have lake effects now. 193 00:15:03.450 –> 00:15:06.829 Dr. Oliver Davis: and that means that that day those kids won't get fed. 194 00:15:09.780 –> 00:15:12.529 Dr. Oliver Davis: So as I jump up and down 195 00:15:13.000 –> 00:15:17.180 Dr. Oliver Davis: for them, they're not going to jump up and down because they have to stay around the house with no food 196 00:15:20.550 –> 00:15:22.050 Dr. Oliver Davis: makes you think again. 197 00:15:22.250 –> 00:15:24.059 Dr. Oliver Davis: Have you seen my childhood? 198 00:15:24.620 –> 00:15:28.980 Dr. Oliver Davis: My childhood doesn't like to have school closed because my meals are gone. 199 00:15:29.160 –> 00:15:32.780 Dr. Oliver Davis: my breakfast is gone, my lunch is gone, my afternoon snack is gone. 200 00:15:33.340 –> 00:15:35.369 Dr. Oliver Davis: or have to stay in an abusive house 201 00:15:35.730 –> 00:15:40.340 Dr. Oliver Davis: during Covid was rough, more challenges, more issues, and everything else was amazing. 202 00:15:42.210 –> 00:15:44.969 Dr. Oliver Davis: Have you seen my childhood? Some of the words 203 00:15:45.400 –> 00:15:46.850 Dr. Oliver Davis: it says this 204 00:15:49.090 –> 00:15:51.350 Dr. Oliver Davis: before you judge me. 205 00:15:52.070 –> 00:15:54.370 Dr. Oliver Davis: Try hard to love me 206 00:15:56.660 –> 00:15:58.230 Dr. Oliver Davis: before you judge me. 207 00:15:59.650 –> 00:16:03.280 Dr. Oliver Davis: Try hard to let me. He said it several times through the song 208 00:16:04.130 –> 00:16:05.329 Dr. Oliver Davis: it comes to mind. 209 00:16:06.040 –> 00:16:08.369 Alysan Aachen Martinez (She/Her): I actually wrote those words down 210 00:16:08.670 –> 00:16:09.999 Alysan Aachen Martinez (She/Her): when the song was playing. 211 00:16:10.568 –> 00:16:13.260 Alysan Aachen Martinez (She/Her): tried to love me as the 212 00:16:13.460 –> 00:16:15.660 Alysan Aachen Martinez (She/Her): the thing that stuck out to me most, and then 213 00:16:16.080 –> 00:16:20.579 Alysan Aachen Martinez (She/Her): next to it, I wrote, instead of just looking at what you see initially, superficially. 214 00:16:20.620 –> 00:16:23.280 Alysan Aachen Martinez (She/Her): Take the time to see me as a story. 215 00:16:24.050 –> 00:16:25.279 Alysan Aachen Martinez (She/Her): and my parents. 216 00:16:25.470 –> 00:16:27.340 Dr. Oliver Davis: Tell me more about the story. 217 00:16:29.100 –> 00:16:40.839 Alysan Aachen Martinez (She/Her): you know, I remember watching like one of the 1st things that comes to mind right now is just this Instagram post that I saw some time ago, and this woman said it in another way. She says, I am not just this event. 218 00:16:40.980 –> 00:16:48.690 Alysan Aachen Martinez (She/Her): I am a series of events, and they all connect, somehow. You know, she's going on this rant and rave. But I was like, Yeah. 219 00:16:49.240 –> 00:16:50.910 Alysan Aachen Martinez (She/Her): so in that moment 220 00:16:51.594 –> 00:16:56.620 Alysan Aachen Martinez (She/Her): somebody had like said, You know you look crazy, or you look cuckoo! She's like fine. I look, cuckoo! 221 00:16:56.760 –> 00:17:03.350 Alysan Aachen Martinez (She/Her): But this is just one event. You didn't see all the other ones leading up to this right? So 222 00:17:04.040 –> 00:17:25.509 Alysan Aachen Martinez (She/Her): It's like all the all the different narratives, all of the different roles we play, all the different masks that we wear, like somebody said, you know, going to school. There's a whole new set of, I think, Kimberly said. You know, going to school. There's a whole new set of anxieties, the new set at home. Because we're wearing different masks. We're putting on different roles. We are fulfilling different narratives 223 00:17:25.988 –> 00:17:34.949 Alysan Aachen Martinez (She/Her): all led by like different archetypes, or what our pre like, what we, you know, our preconceptions and our misconceptions, or maybe some of the things that we have right 224 00:17:34.990 –> 00:17:38.690 Alysan Aachen Martinez (She/Her): about the world, carrying all of that with us all the time. 225 00:17:39.650 –> 00:17:41.230 Dr. Oliver Davis: Before you judge me. 226 00:17:41.510 –> 00:17:42.450 Alysan Aachen Martinez (She/Her): Had to be seen. 227 00:17:42.450 –> 00:17:44.309 Dr. Oliver Davis: Here are my series of stories. 228 00:17:44.310 –> 00:17:54.130 Alysan Aachen Martinez (She/Her): Yes, yes, we're. It's so complex. But at the root at the root, like hopefully, we can find some commonalities, at least through feelings, if nothing else, you know. 229 00:17:54.450 –> 00:17:55.130 Dr. Oliver Davis: Hmm. 230 00:17:55.680 –> 00:17:59.560 Dr. Oliver Davis: okay, class, you've just heard our whole presentation for tonight. Thank you. Have a good night. 231 00:18:01.095 –> 00:18:05.020 Dr. Oliver Davis: You summed it up nicely. 232 00:18:05.020 –> 00:18:07.228 Kimberley Mattioli: Anniversary today, 21 years. 233 00:18:07.670 –> 00:18:13.319 Dr. Oliver Davis: Oh, cool! And you are different in your snapshot today than you were 21 years ago. 234 00:18:13.320 –> 00:18:14.744 Kimberley Mattioli: Oh, yes, I am. 235 00:18:15.820 –> 00:18:18.739 Dr. Oliver Davis: You know, and seeing the different series of my life. 236 00:18:20.520 –> 00:18:22.419 Dr. Oliver Davis: it's interesting when I look at them. 237 00:18:23.050 –> 00:18:25.269 Dr. Oliver Davis: the good parts, the sad parts. 238 00:18:26.164 –> 00:18:29.680 Dr. Oliver Davis: Today. I've been going through a lot of pictures with my friends who have passed. 239 00:18:29.870 –> 00:18:32.070 Dr. Oliver Davis: and I saw some of them. I'm like, Wow. 240 00:18:32.860 –> 00:18:33.860 Dr. Oliver Davis: you know. 241 00:18:34.915 –> 00:18:36.490 Dr. Oliver Davis: I've learned to keep pictures. 242 00:18:37.680 –> 00:18:42.499 Dr. Oliver Davis: I've learned to keep pictures of my victories and keep pictures of my losses. 243 00:18:43.320 –> 00:18:45.300 Dr. Oliver Davis: because they're all different series of me. 244 00:18:46.500 –> 00:18:48.750 Dr. Oliver Davis: If I only keep pictures of my victories 245 00:18:48.810 –> 00:18:50.240 Dr. Oliver Davis: that's unrealistic. 246 00:18:50.610 –> 00:18:59.619 Dr. Oliver Davis: and I don't know how to plan for downtimes. I've only keep pictures of my sad times. That's also unrealistic, and it's too depressing. I don't know how to make it. 247 00:19:00.760 –> 00:19:02.419 Dr. Oliver Davis: Keeping pictures of both 248 00:19:02.810 –> 00:19:04.300 Dr. Oliver Davis: balances me out. 249 00:19:04.990 –> 00:19:08.509 Dr. Oliver Davis: Have you seen my childhood? He says, before you love me. 250 00:19:08.830 –> 00:19:10.400 Dr. Oliver Davis: But how the Netherlands says 251 00:19:11.950 –> 00:19:15.350 Dr. Oliver Davis: The painful youth I've had! 252 00:19:17.220 –> 00:19:18.930 Dr. Oliver Davis: What pains have you had? 253 00:19:20.530 –> 00:19:23.049 Dr. Oliver Davis: What's been their pains before they come to see you. 254 00:19:23.110 –> 00:19:28.869 Dr. Oliver Davis: or while they are still seeing you, young man. Today I've I've known him since. Now I'm going to my second year. 255 00:19:28.950 –> 00:19:35.019 Dr. Oliver Davis: He asked to see me today. I was rushing, doing something else, and I was in the office, and he said, Is Mr. Davis there? 256 00:19:35.840 –> 00:19:44.680 Dr. Oliver Davis: And then I looked out, because when somebody has caused my name. I know they have personally requested, and I recognized his voice, and I said, I have something else to do. But can you wait for a few minutes, he said, Yeah, I'll wait. 257 00:19:45.960 –> 00:19:46.530 Dr. Oliver Davis: And 258 00:19:47.290 –> 00:19:50.220 Dr. Oliver Davis: I was looking at him because I said, he's not in trouble. What's going on. 259 00:19:50.920 –> 00:19:53.830 Dr. Oliver Davis: And so, after I finished my other situation, I called him in. 260 00:19:53.880 –> 00:19:55.070 Dr. Oliver Davis: I said, What's up, man? 261 00:19:56.200 –> 00:19:59.030 Dr. Oliver Davis: My parents announced to me this week they're going through a divorce. 262 00:20:02.040 –> 00:20:04.542 Dr. Oliver Davis: and I said, it's harder focuses. And he said, 263 00:20:07.580 –> 00:20:09.549 Dr. Oliver Davis: we just pause for a few minutes 264 00:20:10.330 –> 00:20:13.560 Dr. Oliver Davis: instead of top it off. My dad got arrested this weekend, too. 265 00:20:18.350 –> 00:20:20.830 Dr. Oliver Davis: Yeah, we got on Thursday. Yeah. 266 00:20:21.270 –> 00:20:23.740 Dr. Oliver Davis: who couldn't focus this weekend and asked to see me. 267 00:20:24.310 –> 00:20:26.500 Dr. Oliver Davis: You could play uno all the time last year 268 00:20:27.220 –> 00:20:28.319 Dr. Oliver Davis: pretty good player 269 00:20:29.550 –> 00:20:38.720 Dr. Oliver Davis: in 6th grade, and so I hadn't seen him, and he came and asked for me today, and we just sat there. I said, I need you to check in with me for a few weeks, because this is not going away today. 270 00:20:39.040 –> 00:20:40.239 Dr. Oliver Davis: He says, I know. 271 00:20:42.750 –> 00:20:43.490 Dr. Oliver Davis: Hmm! 272 00:20:44.650 –> 00:20:46.419 Dr. Oliver Davis: The painful youth 273 00:20:46.570 –> 00:20:47.690 Dr. Oliver Davis: I have. 274 00:20:50.520 –> 00:20:52.159 Dr. Oliver Davis: Have you seen my childhood? 275 00:20:53.740 –> 00:21:01.339 Dr. Oliver Davis: He checked in for about 15 min and then send them on back to class. So sometimes we're checking for 5 min, other times we're checking for 10, 276 00:21:01.740 –> 00:21:04.310 Dr. Oliver Davis: he said. I know where you are, I said. Cool 277 00:21:07.000 –> 00:21:08.480 Dr. Oliver Davis: kind of cool, having a 278 00:21:09.570 –> 00:21:11.250 Dr. Oliver Davis: 12 year old. Come, look for you. 279 00:21:14.420 –> 00:21:15.589 Dr. Oliver Davis: share his pain. 280 00:21:17.790 –> 00:21:20.420 Dr. Oliver Davis: get a little pep talk and head on back to class. 281 00:21:22.500 –> 00:21:23.479 Dr. Oliver Davis: What's your thoughts? 282 00:21:28.630 –> 00:21:33.715 Derek Howell: I really particularly heard him when he said 283 00:21:34.440 –> 00:21:36.759 Derek Howell: The wonder of childhood! 284 00:21:38.070 –> 00:21:39.700 Dr. Oliver Davis: Oh, 4 talked about that. 285 00:21:41.040 –> 00:21:42.530 Dr. Oliver Davis: Go for it. Tell me. 286 00:21:42.530 –> 00:21:46.010 Derek Howell: Oh, and so and and so it made me think of not only like 287 00:21:46.190 –> 00:21:51.829 Derek Howell: the the like of the admiration of wonder, of childhood, but also of like 288 00:21:52.010 –> 00:21:59.650 Derek Howell: and the the mysticism behind childhood like. You know how, with this big world that we don't know, but also these 289 00:21:59.860 –> 00:22:09.910 Derek Howell: unfamiliar things that we ex that children experience that they don't quite understand like, particularly like a divorce like. 290 00:22:10.250 –> 00:22:21.030 Derek Howell: So what is all of that about? And so how do they figure out that. And then so how does that play into the rest of their life? So that's that's where my mind went when I heard that what he said, based on the 291 00:22:21.150 –> 00:22:23.020 Derek Howell: topic that you're talking about. 292 00:22:23.440 –> 00:22:24.050 Dr. Oliver Davis: Hmm! 293 00:22:25.380 –> 00:22:30.729 Dr. Oliver Davis: I told him. I said if you had asked me that several years ago, I really wouldn't understand. But now that I've gone through it. 294 00:22:31.160 –> 00:22:32.470 Dr. Oliver Davis: said, It's crazy. 295 00:22:34.610 –> 00:22:36.059 Dr. Oliver Davis: He nodded his hair. 296 00:22:39.

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