Good start – to improve: Title – make more specific. When – time frame? Abstract – add. Thesis – write much more directly and concisely (e.g., remove ‘This exploration is..

Good start – to improve: Title – make more specific. When – time frame? Abstract – add. Thesis – write much more directly and concisely (e.g., remove "This exploration is…"); instead of describing a problem, write a single sentence that you intend to prove (like the very last statement in the submission). Methodology – add. Body – use proper outline structure and formatting: A. 1. 2. B. 1. 2. etc. Conclusion – At the end, describe the significance of your thesis. References – add a few examples in proper APA format. General – write much more directly (remove title page); correct the usage of numbers (year); avoid passive voice ("has been acknowledged…" by whom?). Be very specific. You may resubmit if you wish.