Read through the sample draft and determine how the writer gets off track and what they could do to stenghten “the first draft.”
There is 3 Draft Sample . They are 3 different Draft Sample.
1. Read through the sample draft and determine how the writer gets off track and what they could do to stenghten “the first draft.”
a) Which “pitfall” does the writer fall into in the first draft ?
b) What can the writer do to revise and strengthen the essay? ( meaning what can the writer do to get out of the “pitfall” ? )
Add Page Insert Table Chart Text Shape Media Cor EXCERPT Sample Draft Synthesis Essay 3 The question of how to improve education is a perennial one because there are many seeming Intractable problems — inequality of access to quality education, how to make education relevant and ENL 102 In-Class Activity: MA3 Common Pitfalls issues of student engagement and interest. One idea that frequently comes up is that using technology in the classroom could help to solve or alleviate these problems. The authors we’ve read show us two different perspectives on this "solution." One side believes that new technologies can address a range of issues in education, from access to engagement. Ise other side worries that technology use in the classroom is at best a flashy way of papering over the problems and at worst that it will "dumb down" education. Both Waddell and Gelernter address the limitations and dangers of using technology in the classroom. While technology seems like it offers the possibility of revolutionizing education and therefore solving some of our longstanding problems, in practice it doesn’t always work that way. Because technology offers ways to circumvent traditional barriers, geographical and societal, allowing for instant communication and interaction, anywhere, at any time, and because it allows for a new kind of Immersive experience, there is a hope that it can address issues ranging from unequal access to education to lack of student engagement. While some of that may be true, we need to guard against the possibility that technology use may be a "band-aid" solution that covers over the underlying problem, but doesn’t fix it. Which "pitfall" does the writer fall into in this draft? What can the writer do to revise and strengthen the essay? (That is, what can the writer do to get out of the "pitfall"?)
1. Read through the sample draft and determine how the writer gets off track and what they could do to stenghten “the second draft.”
a) Which “pitfall” does the writer fall into in the second draft ?
b) What can the writer do to revise and strengthen the essay? ( meaning what can the writer do to get out of the “pitfall” ? )
+ A Add Page Insert Table Chart Text Shape Media Comment ENL 102 In-Class Activity: MA3 Common Pitfalls The question of how to improve education is a perennial one because there are many seemingly intractable problems – Inequality of access to quality education, how to make education relevant and issues of student engagement and interest. One idea that frequently comes up is that using technology in the classroom could help to solve or alleviate these problems. The authors we’ve read show us two different perspectives on this "solution." One side believes that new technologies can address a range of issues in education, from access to engagement. The other side worries that technology use in the classroom is at best a flashy way of papering over the problems and at worst that it will "dumb down" education. Both David Gelerter and Keyah Waddell push back against the enthusiastic embrace of technology as an easy solution to education’s problems. Though writing in different eras and focusing on different educational problems, they are both primarily concerned with unmasking a kind of uncritical "rush" to use technology in the classroom. Though they both see that technology use has a place in education, they both believe that a kind of unthinking application of technology will at best perpetuate existing problems and at worst create new ones. In his discussion of MOOCs, Waddell points out the discrepancy between the hopes and expectations raised by the potential for MOOCs to alleviate the problem of unequal access to education, and the reality of their implementation. In describing how, in practice, access to MOOCs has merely replicated unequal access to education based on socioeconomic factors, Waddell argues that the mere application of technology to educational problems isn’t enough – we still need to address the underlying societal factors that impede access. Gelerter also writes to argue against the unthinking and indiscriminate application of technology. He believes that computer use in the classroom can, used properly, fill certain gaps and enhance education, but he is afraid that we will be too excited by the "bells and whistles" of computers and assume that they can solve all problems. Unlike Waddell, though, he isn’t just worried that existing problems will be replicated, he is afraid that new problems will be created – that what and how we teach with computers will dumb down education. While Gelernter raises a good discussion point, in the intervening years since 1994 when he wrote his essay, his fears have failed to materialize. From our present-day perspective, his diatribes against multimedia seem unjustified and overwrought. As Cathy Davidson points out in her essay, "Project Classroom Makeover," learning and the way we access information has changed and we don’t necessarily need to judge it as "better" or "worse"." Ultimately, both Waddell and Gelernter usefully raise the issue that we should be thoughtful about the use of technology in education. As they show us, it is good to think critically and honestly about the Impact of technology use in the classroom, but we should also avoid the kind of excess negativity and resistance that Gelernter displays. Such an attitude can block us from discovering potential and unexpected benefits that technology offers. Which "pitfall" does the writer fall into in this draft? What can the writer do to revise and strengthen the essay? (That is, what can the writer do to get out of the "pitfall"?)
1. Read through the sample draft and determine how the writer gets off track and what they could do to stenghten “the third draft.”
a) Which “pitfall” does the writer fall into in the third draft ?
b) What can the writer do to revise and strengthen the essay? ( meaning what can the writer do to get out of the “pitfall” ? )
Add Page Insert Table Chart Text Shape Media Comment ENL 102 In-Class Activity: MA3 Common Pitfalls Following are excerpts from three draft Synthesis Essays in which the writer falls into the "pitfalls" that we discussed in class today: writing about the issue in general terms, summarizing the articles rather than synthesizing them, or including a critique of the articles. Read through the sample drafts and determine for each one how the writer gets off track and what they could do to strengthen the draft. EXCERPT Sample Draft Synthesis Essay 1 The question of how to improve education is a perennial one because there are many seemingly Intractable problems – inequality of access to quality education, how to make education relevant and issues of student engagement and interest. One idea that frequently comes up is that using technology in the classroom could help to solve or alleviate these problems. The authors we’ve read show us two different perspectives on this "solution." One side believes that new technologies can address a range of issues in education, from access to engagement. The other side worries that technology use in the classroom is at best a flashy way of papering over the problems and at worst that it will "dumb down" education. In "Virtual Classrooms Are as Unequal as Real Ones," Kevah Waddell offers an argument that the use of technology alone won’t solve our educational problems. Examining and discussing MOOCS (massive open online courses) he argues that although it seems as if MOOCs would be an ideal way to address the problems of unequal access to education, in reality those problems have just been replicated in online courses. Using statistics he shows the reader how, although the courses are open to all, in practice those who take advantage of them are usually those who are already advantaged. This happens, he argues, because access to the technology isn’t enough – people need guidance and preparation to help them become knowledgeable about and comfortable with the technology.. Therefore, he argues, innovating education with technology isn’t enough .- in order to overcome barriers we still have to work to counteract societal forces that limit equality. In "Unplugged: The Myth of Computers in the Classroom," David Gellerter presents another argument for potential negative effects from technology use in the classroom, Although he believes that computers have a limited place in the classroom, Gelester cautions against the "religious awe" that unthinkingly advocates for computer use in the classroom, seeing computers as a "godsend" to solve educational problems. In particular, he believes that computers can impede actual important learning by spoonfeeding information to students, not allowing them to formulate their own ideas and connections or to make and correct their own mistakes. Ultimately Gelerntet fears, this could undermine the learning of basics skills such as reading, critical thinking, etc. Which "pitfall" does the writer fall into in this draft? What can the writer do to revise and strengthen the essay? (That is, what can the writer do to get out of the "pitfall" ?) EXCERPT Sample Draft Synthesis Essay 2
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